You Can't Make This Stuff Up! You've got to see this.
Posted 18 March 2006 - 08:49 AM
* Females are forbidden from doing their own hair without being licensed by the state.
* Dogs must have a permit signed by the mayor in order to congregate in groups of three or more on private property.
* Oklahoma will not tolerate anyone taking a bite out of another's hamburger.
* It is against the law to read a comic book while operating a motor vehicle.
* Whaling is illegal.
* It is illegal to have the hind legs of farm animals in your boots.
* Residents are taxed for the furniture in their homes, and any other personal belongings.
* People who make "ugly faces" at dogs may be fined and/or jailed.
* No one may spit on a sidewalk.
* It is illegal to wear your boots to bed.
* It is illegal to have sex before you are married.
* Fish may not be contained in fishbowls while on a public bus.
* Tissues are not to be found in the back of one's car.
* One may not promote a "horse tripping event".
* It is illegal for the owner of a bar to allow anyone inside to pretend to have sex with a buffalo.
LOCAL LAWS, BY TOWN
* If you wear New York Jets clothing, you may be put in jail.
* If ones dog is run over by a car, the owner must pay for the dog's disposal.
* No person may own more than two adult cats.
* It is illegal to cause "annoying vibrations" in the city limits.
* Persons may not play catch on any city street.
* Molesting an automobile is illegal.
* It is unlawful to put any hypnotized person in a display window.
* No one may walk backwards downtown while eating a hamburger.
* Women may not gamble in the nude, in lingerie, or while wearing a towel.
* You may not open a soda bottle without the supervision of a licensed engineer.
* Elephants are not to be taken into the downtown area.
* One's mode of transportation must be tied up while not attended.
* Mules may not drink out of bird baths.
* Clothes may not be washed in bird baths.
* It is illegal to tie a horse in front of city hall.
* While passing another vehicle, you must honk your horn.
Posted 18 March 2006 - 02:09 PM
That one is my favourite. So is it okay for lesbian vibrations - I mean what is annoying about two women getting it on with each other?
Second favourite: People who make "ugly faces" at dogs may be fined and/or jailed.
JetSon are you sure these are true?
Posted 18 March 2006 - 06:37 PM
· The "Ice Cream Man" and his truck are banned.
Nobody is allowed to ride a bicycle in a swimming pool.
· City Council order reads: "No dog shall be in a public place without its master on a leash."
· It is illegal to spit, except on baseball diamonds.
· It is illegal to posses, own or raise roosters. This is considered disturbing the peace.
· Los Angeles
· Toads may not be licked.
· San Francisco
· Persons classified as "ugly" may not walk down any street.
· Can't cut off a chicken's head on Sunday.
· Chicken must be eaten with the hands.
· It is illegal to say "Oh, Boy"
It is illegal for a chicken to cross the road.
Putting salt on a railraod track may be punishable by death.
· One may not pee in his neighbor's mouth.
· There is a $1,000 dollar fine for beating rats with baseball bats.
· It is illegal for children to have unusual haircuts.
· Owners of horses may not ride them at night without tail lights
It is illegal for both sexes to flirt or respond to flirtation using the eyes and/or hands.
· Lenoir City
· When you pull up to a stop sign you must fire a gun out the window to warn horse carriages that you are coming.
It is illegal to give any pie to fellow diners. It is also illegal to take unfinished pie home. All pie must be eaten on the premises.
· It is illegal for barbers to threaten to cut off kid's ears
· South Bend
· It is illegal to make a monkey smoke a cigarette.
All lollipops are banned.
It is illegal to pretend that one's parents are rich.
Women who sit on men's laps on buses or trains without placing a pillow between them face an automatic six-month jail term.
· You may not ride an ugly horse.
· You may not drive a black car on Sundays.
· It is unlawful to lend your vacuum cleaner to your next-door neighbor.
" Winning isn't everything; its the only thing"
RIP Uncle Bob 5/12/06