NYJetsFan.com Forums: Brian Shotty Resume - NYJetsFan.com Forums

Jump to content

Toggle shoutbox NYJETSFAN BANTER

Quote

"We're not a bad football team; we just do stupid stuff," said Eric Decker
Jetsman05 Icon : (28 October 2014 - 04:52 PM) Harlem not in our league... doesn't matter
santana Icon : (28 October 2014 - 06:17 PM) you don't matter!
santana Icon : (28 October 2014 - 06:17 PM) and that wasn't a red card RIP SWANSEA
Jetsfan0099 Icon : (28 October 2014 - 08:20 PM) Manish is really annoying with his vendetta against Idzik though, you can tell it's personal because he doesn't have his scoops anymore.
Jetsfan0099 Icon : (28 October 2014 - 08:20 PM) Since Idzik has became GM, Manish has lost all of his sources.
Jetsfan0099 Icon : (28 October 2014 - 08:21 PM) its clear that this bothers Manish deeply and hes throwing little tantrums about it
azjetfan Icon : (28 October 2014 - 08:57 PM) Manish should not have a job. He and Idzik should be fired
SecondHandJets Icon : (28 October 2014 - 09:16 PM) Hey bitches
SecondHandJets Icon : (28 October 2014 - 09:16 PM) How's everyone enjoying your New York Jets?
MikeGangGree... Icon : (28 October 2014 - 09:28 PM) Jose Canseco just pulled a Plaxico Burress.
azjetfan Icon : (28 October 2014 - 10:01 PM) Shot himself in the leg?
HarlemHxC814 Icon : (28 October 2014 - 10:05 PM) Shot his middle finger
MikeGangGree... Icon : (28 October 2014 - 10:09 PM) Suck for the Duck
santana Icon : (Yesterday, 10:57 AM) Milber didnt die for this
azjetfan Icon : (Yesterday, 12:30 PM) How pissed are we all going to be if Vick comes in and wins a bunch of games knocking us out of the top 5 picks?
azjetfan Icon : (Yesterday, 12:32 PM) We are sitting in either 2 or 3 depending on the tie breaker with Jax
azjetfan Icon : (Yesterday, 12:32 PM) If Oakland can pull out a couple wins we would be in good shape.
Jetsfan0099 Icon : (Yesterday, 01:35 PM) Vick=$$$
MikeGangGree... Icon : (Yesterday, 07:09 PM) THE BEETS
santana Icon : (Yesterday, 07:10 PM) Patty mayonnaise never gave up that poon
santana Icon : (Yesterday, 07:51 PM) Game 7
MikeGangGree... Icon : (Yesterday, 07:54 PM) Forget the Beets
MikeGangGree... Icon : (Yesterday, 07:54 PM) forget game 7
MikeGangGree... Icon : (Yesterday, 07:54 PM) THE KNICKS
santana Icon : (Yesterday, 08:07 PM) No one cares about the Knicks
santana Icon : (Yesterday, 08:07 PM) NO ONE LIKES MILLHOUSE
MikeGangGree... Icon : (Yesterday, 09:14 PM) No one cares about Santana
MikeGangGree... Icon : (Yesterday, 09:15 PM) after we traded you
santana Icon : (Yesterday, 09:36 PM) Well fine! I'll start another fanboard with black jack and hookers! Infact forget the fanboard!
MikeGangGree... Icon : (Yesterday, 10:27 PM) Was the best time of your playing days the Monday night game against Dallas in 05??
MikeGangGree... Icon : (Yesterday, 10:31 PM) https://www.youtube....h?v=3MQnxQdvIgY
MikeGangGree... Icon : (Yesterday, 10:32 PM) just go to 2:50
MikeGangGree... Icon : (Yesterday, 10:33 PM) and 4:15
Jetsman05 Icon : (Today, 06:48 AM) everyone i have a confession
Jetsman05 Icon : (Today, 06:48 AM) santana is a solid individual
Chaos Icon : (Today, 07:41 AM) hacked?
Chaos Icon : (Today, 07:41 AM) Brady vs Denver or Brees vs Carolina?
santana Icon : (Today, 10:45 AM) Brady
santana Icon : (Today, 10:45 AM) Saints blow on the road
MikeGangGree... Icon : (Today, 10:57 AM) Santana at his best https://www.youtube....h?v=CgmfTyITaY0
santana Icon : (Today, 12:53 PM) Correction that's Quincy carter at his best
NJAzrael71 Icon : (Today, 01:22 PM) Brees vs Carolina or Kaepernick vs St Louis? St Louis gives up the most to QB's but Brees can light up Carolina's D.
santana Icon : (Today, 01:25 PM) Milber is love Milber is life
santana Icon : (Today, 01:57 PM) seems like vick still has that fast ball
santana Icon : (Today, 01:57 PM) $$
Resize Shouts Area

Page 1 of 1

Brian Shotty Resume

#1 User is offline   triple3s Icon

  • Line Coach
  • Icon
  • Group: Members
  • Posts: 863
  • Joined: 11-April 05
  • Gender:Male

  • NFL Team:

  • MLB:

Posted 06 January 2012 - 01:48 PM

I don't know if anyone posted this but i thought it was hilarious.

http://turnonthejets...heimers-resume/

I don't know how to post it so it is shown in the forum so theres the link




Quote

LEAKED: Brian Schottenheimer’s Resume
January 6th, 2012 | by Joe Caporoso | Posted Image

Due to my terrific inside sources around the New York Jets organization, I have been able to acquire a copy of the resume Brian Schottenheimer is using on his head coaching interviews.

Overview of Strengths

  • Ability to coach a mediocre offense, with either a competent veteran (Chad Pennington), a top ten draft pick (Mark Sanchez), or a future Hall of Famer (Brett Favre) at quarterback.
  • Can receive constant praise for innovation due to confusing calls and despite me never breaking tendencies.
  • Can get away with calling 67 passes in a run first offense, without my head coach even noticing.
  • My offense allows for 75% of our fans to call out the play before it is ran.
Offensive Philosophy

  • On every single play, split my fullback out in the slot and motion him into fullback even though I know everybody knows he isn’t staying in the slot and will motion in.
  • Also sub in a specific receiver who is bigger and can block so I can motion him in towards the formation on all running plays.
  • Sub out four or five players on every play, we need a specific group to throw with and a specific group to run with.
  • Use all of these motions and subbing to confuse my offense, so we can have multiple false start penalties and delay of games, along with blowing timeouts frequently.
  • Never, ever throw the football down the field outside the hashes. The entire game takes place within 5 yards of the quarterback, inside of the hash marks.
  • Ignore the running game when it is working. Ignore the passing game when it is working.
  • Run stretch plays with my slowest running back in 2nd and short to set up 3 and 5.
  • Run 4 yard crossing routes on 3rd and 9.
  • Do not use explosive players enough – see Leon Washington, Joe McKnight.
Highlights

  • Needed my team to call timeout before the first play of the game, even though we had the first play scripted all week.
  • Dropped Mark Sanchez back 67 times against the New York Giants pass rush, when we were averaging 5 yards per carry.
  • Played Matthew Mulligan 25 snaps per game for an entire season.
Favorite Plays

  • Shotgun 4-wide, throw a 4 yard hook route to the tight end, usually on 3rd and long.
  • Motion receiver towards the formation and run toss, usually for a 3 or 4 yard loss.
  • Play action boot on 2nd and short out of the same formation, where the quarterback only has the option to throw to the tight end in the flat.
  • Slant. Slant. Slant.
Standard Drives

  • 1st and 10 – Run the football for a 1 yard gain.
  • 2nd and 9 – Throw 4 yard hook route to tight end.
  • 3rd and 5 – Throw 3 yard crossing route.
  • 1st and 10 – Run the football for a 7 yard gain.
  • 2nd and 3 – Go shotgun, get the quarterback sacked.
  • 3rd and 12 – Draw or check down to running back.
  • 1st and 10 – Throw slant for 8 yards
  • 2nd and 2 – Play action boot, quarterback rolls out, throws incompletion.
  • 3rd and 2 – Shotgun, sack or incompletion.

0

#2 User is offline   Jetsfan0099 Icon

  • Assistant Head Coach
  • Icon
  • Group: Moderator
  • Posts: 17,015
  • Joined: 30-July 05
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:New Jersey

  • NFL Team:

  • MLB:

Posted 06 January 2012 - 01:52 PM

haha good find
Posted Image
0

#3 User is offline   SecondHandJets Icon

  • Assistant Head Coach
  • Icon
  • Group: Members
  • Posts: 7,489
  • Joined: 28-November 05
  • Gender:Male

  • NFL Team:

  • MLB:

Posted 06 January 2012 - 01:53 PM

That's awesome
0

#4 User is offline   S-Dubb Icon

  • 2008 Best Insider Award
  • Icon
  • View blog
  • Group: Assistant Admin
  • Posts: 31,145
  • Joined: 02-May 05
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:---
  • Interests:Hardcore Jets & Knicks fan - Gym rat - health and nutrition - family man and proud father.

    Twitter: @NYJETSFANCOM

  • NFL Team:

  • MLB:

Posted 06 January 2012 - 01:56 PM

It should be Sanchez & Schotty resume.
0

#5 User is offline   triple3s Icon

  • Line Coach
  • Icon
  • Group: Members
  • Posts: 863
  • Joined: 11-April 05
  • Gender:Male

  • NFL Team:

  • MLB:

Posted 06 January 2012 - 01:59 PM

View PostS-Dubb, on 06 January 2012 - 01:56 PM, said:

It should be Sanchez & Schotty resume.


lol. nah this includes years with Penny and Farve. Looking at this made me realize just how bad he is and how true EVERYTHING in this article is. i love the "split fullback out in slot" lmao. I can't wait to get a new OC.
0

#6 User is offline   JSOTF Icon

  • LB Coach
  • Icon
  • Group: Members
  • Posts: 1,328
  • Joined: 30-March 05
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:El Paso

  • NFL Team:

  • MLB:

Posted 06 January 2012 - 04:19 PM

this made my day!!!!!
0

#7 User is online   santana Icon

  • I'm batman
  • Icon
  • Group: Admin
  • Posts: 7,843
  • Joined: 03-June 05
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:Washington DC
  • Interests:Keeping this place from breaking... and titties.

  • NFL Team:

  • MLB:

Posted 06 January 2012 - 04:47 PM

Slant Slant Slant Slant*

*per-requisite qb too short to see over line
Nyjetsfan.com Jets Fan Forum and Chat
0

#8 User is offline   jetfan4life12 Icon

  • LB Coach
  • Icon
  • Group: Members
  • Posts: 1,102
  • Joined: 04-April 05
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:Boca Raton, FL

  • NFL Team:

  • MLB:

Posted 07 January 2012 - 06:23 PM

View Posttriple3s, on 06 January 2012 - 01:48 PM, said:

I don't know if anyone posted this but i thought it was hilarious.

http://turnonthejets...heimers-resume/

I don't know how to post it so it is shown in the forum so theres the link





Too bad its true but so damn funny!!
0

#9 User is offline   gmany3k Icon

  • Old Timer
  • Icon
  • Group: Members
  • Posts: 8,298
  • Joined: 31-March 05
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:AUSTIN,TX MALE member 2000-01

  • NFL Team:

Posted 07 January 2012 - 11:36 PM

I can balance the amount of running plays Vs passing plays to a fault that it is always a great stat for me on the tv screen.
21ST CENTURY NEW YORK STATE OF MIND ."REST IN PEACE NIGHT OWL TOM"Use Caution when reading my comments>.Posted Image
0

Page 1 of 1


Fast Reply

  

1 User(s) are reading this topic
0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users