NYJetsFan.com Forums: Press Conference Notes For The Next New York Jets Gm - NYJetsFan.com Forums

Jump to content

Toggle shoutbox NYJETSFAN BANTER

SECRETS AND LIES NOTHING BUT SECRETS AND LIES!!
518-JeTS-FaN Icon : (Today, 11:23 AM) marshall traded to the jets pending a physical
2JBallar01 Icon : (Today, 11:36 AM) Looks like a
2JBallar01 Icon : (Today, 11:36 AM) 5th rounder going to Bears
2JBallar01 Icon : (Today, 11:37 AM) Probably means no Cooper or White now. Hopefully that trade with Eagles happens and we trade down
santana Icon : (Today, 11:51 AM) Cooper is pooper
santana Icon : (Today, 11:51 AM) need cutler
MikeGangGree... Icon : (Today, 11:51 AM) Raiders are taking cooper
santana Icon : (Today, 11:51 AM) 2010 me is so excited
santana Icon : (Today, 11:53 AM) http://i.imgur.com/ZD7ljLV.gif
azjetfan Icon : (Today, 01:39 PM) So with the legal tampering period starting tomorrow who are we targeting?
azjetfan Icon : (Today, 01:40 PM) I am sure Maxwell, Cro McCourtney will be rumored but who else?
Chaos Icon : (Today, 01:49 PM) revis?
Chaos Icon : (Today, 01:49 PM) hopefully some linemen
HarlemHxC814 Icon : (Today, 01:50 PM) FIRE MACCAGNAN
azjetfan Icon : (Today, 02:10 PM) FIRE BOWLES!
azjetfan Icon : (Today, 02:12 PM) Mike Iupati?
azjetfan Icon : (Today, 02:13 PM) Bryan Bulaga?
azjetfan Icon : (Today, 02:13 PM) Orlando Franklin had a great year at Guard last year
HarlemHxC814 Icon : (Today, 02:20 PM) TRADE MARSHALL
MikeGangGree... Icon : (Today, 02:21 PM) CUT WILKERSON
MikeGangGree... Icon : (Today, 02:21 PM) MOVE TO LA
HarlemHxC814 Icon : (Today, 02:21 PM) Would love any of those 3
HarlemHxC814 Icon : (Today, 02:22 PM) Iupati for sure though
azjetfan Icon : (Today, 02:25 PM) From my understanding Snacks is a RFA? So we can match whatever deal he is offered?
azjetfan Icon : (Today, 02:26 PM) So we need to Address the O-line and HB depth on Offense.
azjetfan Icon : (Today, 02:26 PM) The secondary and OLB on D
azjetfan Icon : (Today, 02:27 PM) We have a shit pot of Money and 5 picks.
azjetfan Icon : (Today, 02:27 PM) I hope Gailey can fix this Offense.
azjetfan Icon : (Today, 02:28 PM) I feel like I am ranting like GG2003
azjetfan Icon : (Today, 02:29 PM) FIRE HARRIS!
ganggreen2003 Icon : (Today, 02:46 PM) We can get all the weapons we can get to load the weapon but until the JETS have a QB
ganggreen2003 Icon : (Today, 02:46 PM) we will be wasting talent
ganggreen2003 Icon : (Today, 02:46 PM) and the worst thing in life is WASTED TALENT!!! - A BRONX TALE
ganggreen2003 Icon : (Today, 04:08 PM) One of the most positive things that this Marshall signing brings is Amaro getting more balls thrown to him
ganggreen2003 Icon : (Today, 04:08 PM) and we'll finally have legitimate size at WR in the redzone
ganggreen2003 Icon : (Today, 04:08 PM) but still the biggest issue is QB
ganggreen2003 Icon : (Today, 04:09 PM) we can get monsters at WR but without a QB to throw them the ball, it's a waste of talent
azjetfan Icon : (Today, 04:30 PM) Or maybe its a waste of a QB with no WRs to throw to.
HarlemHxC814 Icon : (Today, 04:53 PM) Or anyone to block for him
azjetfan Icon : (Today, 05:17 PM) fire em all
Jetsfan0099 Icon : (Today, 05:37 PM) Get pumped that we have actual wr talent now
ganggreen2003 Icon : (Today, 06:25 PM) being that the JETS haven't had a WR go over 1,000 yards since 2007 when J-CO did it, is pretty indicative how bad our WR corps and subsequently our QB play has been
ganggreen2003 Icon : (Today, 06:27 PM) and that was Chad's last year as a NEW YORK JET
ganggreen2003 Icon : (Today, 06:35 PM) and as far as Harris getting re-signed the only good thing is he is not going to end up with the bills other than that...he's not worth 15 mil guaranteed
santana Icon : (Today, 08:30 PM) FIRE MARSHALL
Resize Shouts Area

Page 1 of 1

Press Conference Notes For The Next New York Jets Gm

#1 User is offline   Chaos Icon

  • D Coordinator
  • Icon
  • Group: Assistant Admin
  • Posts: 3,136
  • Joined: 30-March 05
  • Gender:Male

Posted 18 January 2013 - 10:40 AM

This would be great :hysterical:

Quote

Press Conference Notes For The Next New York Jets GM

The next General Manager of the New York Jets will immediately face a highly scrutinized press conference, where he will answer to a group of bitter beat writers and angry,anxious fans. In hopes of him succeeding and seeing our generally miserable fan-base have something to be happy about, I have prepared the following suggested comments for his first press conference -

(Walk out wearing a Jets polo shirt, holding a clipboard filled with player evaluation notes, with a stop-watch around your neck and a visor on. Jets fans permanently hate “accountants or bean-counters” after Mike Tannenbaum the past few years. The worst possible thing you could do is come out wearing glasses, holding a calculator and use the word “process” more than once. So make yourself look like a coach or “A REAL FOOTBALL GUY”)

“Hello. Let me begin by asking Manish Mehta, Gary Myers or anybody from The Daily News to leave the room. You are banned from the building this season. Is this fully legal? I don’t know. But you can go preoccupy yourselves with fighting back for partial credentials, then come back to watch practice from 700 yards away and have 8 minutes of locker room access per day, where you are only allowed to talk with Tanner Purdum and Hayden Smith. Thank you and good-bye.

Second, Mark Sanchez isn’t going to be on the team next year. I just watched all the game tape from last year and I’m pretty sure him and Russell Wilson don’t play the same sport. Did you see those interceptions against Arizona and the turnovers against Tennessee? LAWD! I don’t care how much money we owe him, he won’t be here. The young man had a good run on the field and off the field…Kate Upton, Eva Longoria…KNOW WHAT I MEAN? Here’s hoping that out of the New York spotlight he can find success in the NFL or just a job alongside Joey Harrington and Jesse Palmer on a college pre-game show.

Third, Tim Tebow isn’t going to be on the team next year. We don’t need the media circus and quasi-cult following for a guy who caps out at being the 25th best quarterback in the league. He can’t throw and throwing is important in today’s NFL. No Sanchez. No Tebow. We’ll find a better quarterback for this year and for the long term and he will be prohibited from talking to GQ.

Pertaining to our offense, nobody will use the term “Ground and Pound” anymore or “All Weather Offense.” There will be no more eligible tackles on 35% of our snaps. There will be no “Wildcat.” We are going to run a competent NFL offense that can complete 15-18 yard passes down the field with some type of regularity. Our running backs will also have the ability to avoid ramming their heads into defenders in the open field and will instead look to make them miss tackles.

On defense…hey Bart Scott, shut up and you are cut. Calvin Pace? Too slow. You are gone too. Bryan Thomas, thanks for everything over the years except the recent apparent assault case on your girlfriend. Guess what? You aren’t coming back. We are going to find linebackers who are fast and can rush the quarterback.

Rex is going to be the coach and that is it. He will draw up Xs and Os and motivate our team. He will also put on 120 pounds and go back to being this guy. He will have no say on personnel decisions. Did you see John Conner play football? Rex will be at Taco Bell during the draft this season and has no choice in the matter.

ESPN won’t be at training camp this year. Woody Johnson will make no public comments related to football,because he sounds like an idiot when he does…sorry Woody. Our entire PR and media department has been fired because they are awful at their jobs. Our entire gameday entertainment department has been fired because they are awful at their jobs. No more celebrity J-E-T-S chants before games. No more announcing the special teams starters. No more fireworks after field goals. More flight crew! And Fireman Ed, here is my personal invite to come back next season and I’m only offering once, put back on that Bruce Harper jersey and come on back.

Fans, we have some work to do but turnarounds happen quick in the NFL. Stay with us.

…oh and Mike Francesa, you are an asshole and nobody associated with our organization will come on WFAN until you start working with Mad Dog again or retire.

Goodnight!”


http://turnonthejets...w-york-jets-gm/
0

Page 1 of 1


Fast Reply

  

1 User(s) are reading this topic
0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users